The more you resist or fear something, the more it will push back. When you relax
and allow, you find things move and develop easily. This principle is clearly seen
when you consider how martial arts experts break bricks and wood with their bare
hands. When you tense up with fear and hit the pile of bricks, it will hurt you a lot.
The way a martial artist breaks through that pile of bricks is by relaxing and focusing
beyond the solid object (not focusing on the barrier that is the object).
The mindset of focusing confidently and calmly beyond the problem or barrier rather
than on the problem or barrier is the key to easily dissolving the barrier.
Many years ago at a seminar, I was in a long line of people waiting to break through
wooden boards with our elbows. I was paralysed by fear and kept moving further back
down the line. As everyone ahead of me successfully broke their board, I started to tell
myself that I could do it too. So I stopped moving to the back of the line and got to
the point where it was my turn. I was terrified but I grabbed hold of the fear and used
it to focus beyond the board (barrier).
With unbelievable ease my elbow sliced through that board like a hot knife through
butter – I was elated!
When you act out of fear and focus on problems, you become rooted to the spot and
are incapable of making decisions or taking any action in your life. Fear rules your
life and holds you back from achieving anything worthwhile.
Fear can be a powerful motivator when we are in danger, it can be the difference
between life and death and as such is a very useful emotion.
However, when our lives are shut down because we are so afraid of everything, we
are barely capable of functioning, then it’s a serious handicap. A life ruled by fear
is a life wasted!
“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total
obliteration. I will face my fear…” (Frank Herbert – ‘Dune’).
Sometimes when we have challenges in life and are hurt, emotionally or physically,
we become fearful of anything or anyone else ever hurting us again and this then
becomes the way we deal with everything. We become defensive, angry, aggressive
or reclusive. We may save ourselves from future pain but we are also blocking any
opportunity for joy, success or love.
Taking risks is a part of living a worthwhile and fulfilling life. I don’t mean gambling
away your house or pursuing deadly hobbies but simply taking the risk of allowing
another person to get to know you or trying out a new career. You never know what
you are capable of if you never dare to do something different! And everyone
is capable of so much more than they believe is possible – even you!